Unhappy Endings

There is a love story from the Chinese Tang Dynasty, that was written over 800 years ago, of two lovers, Yingying (her) and Zhan (him). After a stuttering start, the two lovers subsequently united in ecstasy, but their affair had an unhappy ending. The story's conclusion was not nearly as tragic as Romeo and Juliet—both of the Chinese lovers lived on—but their affair did not enjoy the Hollywood movie ending of riding happily off into the sunset; that compulsory cheery outcome that the movies seem to demand.

Happy endings provide an immediate feel-good rush. We leave the theater or set the book down, with a buoyant feeling. All the problems have been resolved; everyone feels good. But that rosy feeling quickly fades and the story subsequently also fades from memory with it. Escapism seems pleasant in the moment, but quickly dissipates. The white hats won. The lovers live happily ever after. The drama is neatly tied up, but soon forgotten.

That is not reality, however. Real life stories often end ambiguously, or even unhappily; in an ending that leaves us unsettled and unsatisfied. It bugs us. It's disturbing. Many literary and film artists understand this dynamic and they often leave us hanging, or with that feeling of being a little disturbed. Unhappy endings tend to stick with us. The outcome bothers us. We keep mentally working on it, trying to find meaning in the melancholy ending. Sometimes we do discover significance, as we mull it over.

It's similar to poetry—in that we continue to process the message and often find deeper meaning, or realize that the unhappy story ending—though a bit unsettling—can be very appropriate. There often is a moral that is expressed in an unfortunate conclusion, which rosy outcomes rarely deliver.

Chinese society during the time of the Tang Dynasty was rather bothered by the sad ending of the story of Yingyin and Zhan. People wanted to feel better about the tale, so the ending was later given a happy twist. Rather than have them part ways and feel sad or resentful towards the other, the new result saw the lovers living on together in bliss. It made Tang citizens more comfortable for a while, but soon people realized that any lessons offered by the original sad ending were absent. Moreover, the cheery ending did not adequately reflect the values of society at the time—which were to honor one's duty to society, not pursue personal pleasure.

Soon the original unhappy ending was restored. As a result, the story of Yingying and Zhan has endured for hundreds of years. People continue to derive meaning from it. Its twists and turns are still debated and discussed. Is there a lesson here, which the happy ending did not deliver? Many people think so.

When we experience a cognitive jab from a tale, it causes us to persist in thinking about the story. In contrast, a cognitive consolation feels good in the moment, but can soon be forgotten. Being forced out of our comfort zone can be useful. We can learning something and grow from it.